YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOURSELF
a popular issue
your relationship with yourself doesn't only refer to self image. it also includes the way you treat and react to your own emotions, knowing yourself and being comfortable enough to be open about it.
ASSUMED LIMITATIONS
self awareness of strengths and weaknesses is beneficial, as it can give insight about where to work on. However, no one is obliged to be the same person they were five seconds ago. identity is not fixed. using self awareness or assumptions about oneself to determine abilities is limiting. for example, a student may not want to raise their hand in class because they believe they are shy, however they are the ones stopping themselves.
use self awareness to grow, no to restrict.
BEING COMFORTABLE IN YOUR OWN SKIN
being comfortable with yourself is essential when having a good state of mind, but also when forming relationships with others. many people struggle with self-loathing, which has many causes:
trauma
false expectations
high expectations can be imposed by others, whether it is directly or indirectly.dependence on external validation
pleasing others in order to feel some reward, or avoid fear of being marginalized or to disappoint.perfectionism
it is possible to overcome self hatred. becoming aware of the destructive thought patterns is the first step. being compassionate to yourself. you can find more help here.
UNDERSTANDING EMOTION
emotions are chemicals in the brain that can help us react to our surrounding and thoughts. the brain developed them as a survival skill. it takes around 6 seconds for emotions to be released, broken down and absorbed, whereas 90 seconds for the emotion to be completely "flushed out" of our body. feelings, on the other hand, last as long as we let them, and can sometimes refuel these emotions.
often, feelings can influence our thoughts and behaviours, making it harder to feel any better. acknowledging the emotion and letting it fade gradually, rather than suppressing or fixating on it can make us feel more at peace
visualize happiness and sadness as two opposite ends of the spectrum. we aim for peace, it's balance, as we can't stay in either end of the spectrum forever. value life in it's entirety, rather than placing value to happy moments only.